Identity, Labels, & Brands

I’ve been thinking a lot about all three of these topics for a few weeks now. Mulling over in my head what I thought could be a good, reflective blog post, but yet I couldn’t quite figure out how I wanted to put it out there into actual words and text for others to read. I think I just needed to flush things out and ponder more so what it is I was really thinking for the most part. Oddly enough, the more I thought about it, the more I encountered people and moments that would spur further thoughts and reflections.  It was really just an endless cycle, which is good, because it means that it is relevant and important to continue to think about as an educator and really just as a person.

I guess I really started thinking about this a few weeks ago when I was in my office, sitting at our conference table, eating lunch with one of my students. It was an impromptu lunch, and we were simply chatting when another student came up the stairs, came over to us, and asked the student I was with “Do you think I’m ‘ghetto’?” It was said so loudly and bluntly that I caught both of us off guard. She explained that someone had called her ‘ghetto’ and she wanted this other student’s opinion. So I opened my mouth and asked “Well, can you please define ‘ghetto’ for me?”  She didn’t really have a response. Then as she continue to probe the other student with her question, I said to her, “Why do you have to stick a label on yourself?” She responded that others had labeled her. I told her to just be HER. Why bother with how others label you? She looked at me as if I was a bit odd, and continued on.  I sat there, thinking. Why is she letting others frustrate her with this label when she is adamant about NOT being labeled? And it is that way every day, watching students worry about how others perceive them. And sure, we’ve all been there, but how are we, as Student Affairs professionals stopping to educate and develop? (Note: I don’t plan on getting into Identity theories with this one – too many to possibly talk about haha)

But this is just one part of where my brain has been functioning as of late. Identity. And heck, I’m not a pro at this what-so-ever. I think sometimes I am still flowing through some form of identity develop even has my 20’s have already passed me by. And that is just because of circumstance and situations I’ve encountered. Who I was at 25 is not who I am at…32. And that’s ok. I need to continue and evolve in my own identity.  For me, I don’t think that it necessarily means that I don’t know who I am, I’m just continually open to change as I continue to educate myself and accept the cards I’m dealt. At 25 I was starting my career in Student Affairs. I had no idea it would lead me to where I am now.

My other thought has been about acceptance of identities. As I sit and hear stories of bullying, inequality, and people’s inability to be inclusive I  struggle with understanding WHY it happens. Part of me feels that some people are afraid of it. They are afraid to point it out and educate. Even some people I work with – I know this topic would make them uncomfortable. People are afraid to speak their minds for fear of being labeled or “Identified” as what? As someone who supports the rights of everyone? Perhaps. I was afraid of that for a while. I was born and raised Catholic and while my faith is still important to me, I struggle with the idea that my some of my best friends aren’t given the same equality under various churches because they are gay. And it took me a long time before I could openly speak to that in a open forum (ie. Facebook, Twitter).  When I did, I had judgment placed on me. It hurt. But wanting equality for the people I love was more important than that judgment.

I’ve laughed at the amount of songs lately that have resonated with me, and because their message is one of being proud of who you are and what you think. I connect a lot in that way.  And I think because of my quirkiness and whatnot, I tend to find myself surrounded by students who are the same way. Like the Island of Misfit Toys or something. But in my office we dance. Lately our tune of choice has been “Raise Your Glass” by Pink. Lyrics like “Raise your glass if you are wrong in all the right ways” or “If you’re too school for cool” make me smile. It’s an anthem to the kids out there who think there is something wrong with them because they don’t “Fit” – fit WHAT? is my question. I had a colleague who used the term “boxless world” – and that struck me. I now hate when people say “Let’s think outside the box” because really, why do we have to have a box in the first place? It’s just another label. So kick the boxes to the curb.

And then there is “Brand” – what is your brand? In social media we talk a lot about how we brand ourselves.  When Julie P-Kirchmeier brought it up the other day in her tweet – it all seemed to fit with what I was thinking. We do have to manage our social media brand. It’s been amazing to see how some people handle their Twitter accounts. While I know that not ALL of my tweets are based around Student Affairs, I’m aware of what I am branding myself with when I tweet. I know I am surrounded by people that I collaborate with and could maybe even work with or for some day. I’m ok with them knowing I’m a Star Wars nerd or addicted to blueberry flavored coffee. But I see people that seem “untouchable” on twitter, but we know they are in the field or want to be in this field  yet they don’t brand themselves that way. Yes, a Brand is your identity, but don’t let it be a negative label.

Yes I know this is a bunch of thoughts all in one post, but it’s been on my mind and I have felt the need to blog about it for quite some time now, so here it is. I’m pretty sure I have more thoughts on the subject, but I’m pausing now for reflecting on some other things, as well as getting a snack. 🙂